I’m blogging through our transition from traditional church to missional bivocational living. This week has had it all, sadness and anxiety to moments of pure joy.
Today at yoga, our guide led us through a brief meditation exercise. As she was doing it I got this sense, “I want to lead people here at Y through the same thing, maybe I can offer classes on spiritual direction”. I have no idea if that’s possible and I may or may not look into it (probably will), but it was another example of the signs.
Being in this place of not knowing our next steps is exciting but hard. One thing I notice is how wide open my mind is to the signs all around me. Sometimes those signs can be lies, for example I’ll think something really bad is going to happen to my wife or children or that I have a brain tumor (I don’t).
But the other signs are lights, guidance that comes from truth, from my life, from the spirit, from what’s real about me in light of how God made me. They tell me things such as “slow down”, “take time to meditate”, “pursue me”, “read a book”, “go to yoga”, “look into that”, “don’t believe that person”.
I’m reading a few books right now. One “The Good and Beautiful God” by James Bryan Smith about letting God love you. Very deep stuff as letting an invisible being love us is not easy. I’m also reading “Opening to God: Lectio Divina and Life as Prayer” by David Benner on prayer and meditation.
Lastly, I’m on the last chapter of “The Answer to How is Yes” by Peter Block on being an architect, and building life together with others around you. I love this book.
Sometimes I feel powerless and that’s actually the best place for me to be versus the pursuer, networker, solution giver. I have none of those things. When I realize how powerless I am, I get glimpses of where God wants me. I’m trying not to “try so hard” and instead trying (or not trying) to listen to the signs around me.
Have a great day.
Into the future,